Gig Report: KYLIE

Date: Thursday 17 July, 2008, 20:15 hrs

Venue: MEN Arena

Face Value: £50 I think

Gig Buddy: Phil

Describing a Kylie show without pictures is like shouting underwater - almost impossible (try it if you don't believe me). So, I took my camera to the gig and from our seats in the second tier we had a decent view to capture the show. I have a real fondness for the Kylie brand: never in the tabloids for slating other artists, didn't seek masses of publicity for her cancer battle and though her shows are very sexy, doesn't fall out of a nightclub at 2am without underwear. Also, she's an artist that doesn't shy away from her more kitschy background.

I must confess though, I have never seen Kylie perform live and whilst I've always enjoyed the crafty pop tunes she's churned out over the years, I've never been convinced that she can sing very well. Maybe I'm tainted by her appearances with sister Dannii on a 1980's program called Young Talent Time. Never the less, I'm settled in for the show at the MEN arena. The lights go out and it's clear just how many of those glowing naff feathery sticks that have been flogged outside. (And feather boas - puh-lease people, even I know that this ain't going to be 'Showgirl' style tonight.)

So, Kylie takes to the stage after a grand light show introduction standing on the rim of a giant bicycle wheel looking thing. (Told you this was hard to describe without pictures). I'll call this: Act One: Star Wars. The dancers are clad in black PVC and wear Darth Vadar kind of helmets. It works though and the effect is mesmerising. The crowd are already in a frenzy.

Next it's Cheerleader Kylie, and while she's not quite as teeny-tiny as she used to be, she's no heifer. There's plenty of energy in the show and the costumes just keep getting better. It's obvious that there are a large proportion of gay fans for Kylie and the dancers' outfits as usual border on the cheeky side.

Quick costume change while the dancers entertain us with some cheerleading moves and Kylie is back on stage with a Love Boat theme and belts out 'Copacobana' in great style.Possibly my favourite outfit the for the evening (and there were 8 outfits no less to choose from) is the red dress and thigh high boots. Kylie enters for this section riding a giant chrome skull. Ever the crowd-pleaser, Kylie stops between songs to speak with the audience, collect some gifts and thank people for making an effort (there's a guy in the audience who has really come in fancy dress - I assume he's got tickets for more than one show - he's a superfan.)Act 5: Japanese Kylie. Weird, weird, weird - but I like it. Cloaked in traditional headdress, Kylie emerges from a glossy black pyramid in the middle of a cube framework. Having seen one of these on a trip to Hong Kong, Phil and I knew what it was for. Dancers are lowered from above and there is much Samurai sword fighting and 'Crouching Tiger' style leaping. All good.
Petals (like a Cherry Blossom I guess) are constantly falling from overhead and towards the end of this set get much heavier.

A short 'Act' follows with Kyles in a blue dress, performing without much backing from the band. Her voice is surprisingly strong, even if ever-so-slightly nasal. It's difficult to get a good picture of her in this one unfortunately.

Remember how I said the red outfit was my favourite? Scratch that. This is. It's the European military styled Kylie. (Or as Phil put it: the Adam and the Ants Act).




The end of the show is upon us, but time to 'Get Back In Time'. Gay overtones anyone?

It really is the end of the show - even the screens have reverted to Test Card format...

An encore?? Oh, if I must!!

Hard to beat a Kylie show - though the girl on Phil's right didn't smile the entire night. And the big burly guy in front of us had a fight with a female in their party. He yelled at her to 'Fuck Off' and I was nervous that he might punch 4 shades of shit out of her, but instead he sat down and started to cry. Yep, sobbed like a little girl for 3 songs. I wish I'd told her to fuck off too - she stood up in front of me and blocked my view some of the time with her mannish dancing.
Overall: go go go - see this if you get the chance, it's the reason why we pay £50 for a ticket. Seems excessive, but you get a lotta show for it.
Rating: 5 shiny disco balls. And a massive hug to Phil for not hesitating to hold my handbag for me as the only straight guy in the arena.